You know you’ve flipped when you start worrying about the health of a virtual horse on your iPad app. This is what has happened to me.

It all started about two weeks ago, when we got the iPad. I dutifully trawled through the apps pages, trying to find games that would appeal to DB1. We came across one particularly interesting looking one, that allowed you to look after your own horse. DB1 loved it. He called it Dunzy. For three whole days, Dunzy was the favoured thing. ‘Can I can I feed Dunzy, mummy?’ ‘Can I can I groom him?’ (or ‘gwoom’ as DB1 says). ‘Can I can I clean Dunzy’s poos?’.

Then, the interest waned. Apparently, this was because Dunzy wasn’t a zebra. There wasn’t much poor old Dunzy could do about this. And with typical childish fickleness, Dunzy was dropped.

However, for reasons I don’t fully understand myself, I continued Dunzy’s maintenance. With the dogged patience of a care worker looking after an incontinent and neglected old dear, I continued to dutifully mix his alfalfa mix for his tea. I continued to groom the dust off his mucky backside. I even continued to rid his virtual paddock of his multiple steaming dumps so he could run around gleefully without getting his virtual hooves dirty.

Why? I hear you ask? Why would a thirty year old woman play with something aimed at girls aged between 5-8 years old, probably called Jessica or Jasmine? (begs the question though doesn’t it, why was DB1 playing with it too…) Honest answer- I don’t like the thought of Dunzy being neglected. I’ve started to believe in Dunzy. I imagine him running around when I’m not looking, whickering for a carrot or sunflower seed bag, looking sad when I don’t come and visit him.

Christ. I have really flipped, haven’t I.

(I need some serious sleep.)

Thankfully, the boys have been a good deal easier this morning. Thank goodness. DB2 has actually smiled once or twice today, and managed to go a whole half hour at toddler group without grumbling. Even DB1 managed not to do any wilful stealing, fighting, hectoring or maiming today. A highly pleasant change. Ok, so DB1 thought it would be amusing to get his bread roll at lunch, crumble it up between his fingers and sprinkle the entire handful over the floor. Ok, so DB2 decided to chomp down and suck so hard on my neck that he left a gum mark. But hey, they’d be no fun at all if they were perfect, would they? I am slightly concerned that DB1 has an eating disorder and DB2 is a vampire, but other than that, it’s fine. I love my boys.

And now, I must depart. I’ve got a certain horse to check up on…

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